(1) Women who care only about a man’s financial status
Why women do this?
Women look at men as “walking bank statements” when:
1) They look at a man as a “catch” rather than a human being.
2) They feel they cannot take care of themselves and must depend on a man to take care of them.
3) They define themselves based on what other people think of the men they “got,” rather than on who they are as people.
Here is what men say:
I can’t stand those women whom I meet and, right away, they are checking out what kind of car I have, what kind of job I have, what kind of designer clothes I am wearing, where I take my vacations. I don’t feel like they even care about the kind of person I am. All they want is a man to impress their friends, a fancy meal ticket.”
“Women say they want a tender, sensitive, open man, one who is willing to work on the relationship, but they really just want a man with money. If a man doesn’t have a terrific job and is only, let us say, a salesperson in a store or is just starting his own business, the woman couldn’t care less how loving and sweet he is. She is gone, running after some jerk, who will treat her like garbage, but who drives a brand new car and has a wallet full of money and who can take her to big hotels for a meal.
If you ever want to see a man get angry, just bring up this topic. No other topic elicits more angry responses from men who were interviewed.
Men hate feeling used or evaluated for the amount of money they have. The only feeling we can compare it to is how enraged women get when men use or evaluate us for how big our breasts are, or how perfect our bodies are.
Why this turns men off.
Men already walk around feeling pressured to perform. When a woman judges a man purely on his ability to receive financial rewards, he feels totally unappreciated for who he is inside. This lack of emotional safety with a woman is a definite turn- off.
If you want men to love you for what is inside you and not just what is inside you and not just what they see on the outside, you must be willing to do the same for them.
In other words, stop evaluating men by their level of success and take a look at the kind of human being they are. There are millions of wonderful, loving, single men who are being overlooked by women because they don’t own a fashion car or have a prestigious job, or wear flashy clothes. What they have to offer you is much more valuable – sensitivity, fidelity, friendship, and real love.
(2) Stupid superficial women
Why women do this?
Some women demean themselves either by being stupid or by acting stupid using only their bodies to catch men, ignoring their mind and not using their full potential. Unfortunately, our sociological upbringing has, until recently trained us to believe that the intellect is a man’s field, and that a woman’s role is to look pretty and make a man happy. Millions of women still need to wake up to the fact that times are thankfully changing, and that they have just as much intelligence and talents as the men in their lives. Here is what men say ‘I will tell you what turns me off the most- women who have no idea what is going on in the world around them but instead spend their time thinking about their nails or the latest hairstyle, or latest dress, or watching television. I have met lots of women whose looks I was really attracted to, but the minute they opened their mouth I lost interest. They just have their priorities all messed up.’ ‘It is important to me as a man to be proud of the woman I am with to feel I can take her anywhere or introduce to anyone and that she will be able to hold her own. Sure, I like good looks and nice bodies but what turns me on is a woman with a great mind. That is my kind of stimulation.’
Many men agree that women with superficial values turn them off. It is not that all men want a woman with a high IQ or an advanced education or one who prides herself on being an intellectual. After all, men come in all degrees of intelligence too. But men do need to feel that their women are not simply a selfish, self-absorbed, superficial person. They complain about:
1) Women who read fashion magazines, but never news work or time.
2) Women whose conversations consist of gossips about other women, T.V shows and information they picked up in gossip newspapers.
3) Women who act dumb, frivolous and bubble headed.
4) Women who make no effort to continue to educate or improve themselves.
Certainly, there are many men out there just like this who turn you off. But the kind of man you want to be with, is going to want to be with a woman he feels is his equal, not his inferior.
Why this turns men off
They might not admit it, but men often base their sense of self-worth on the kind of woman they have in their life. What other men think of his wife or girlfriend is important to a man. Men need to feel proud of the women they love.
In addition, since men usually feel more comfortable thinking than feeling, they need to know you can relate to them from your mind and not just your body. Men find a good, thoughtful conversation stimulating not just to their minds, but to their bodies as well.
1) Educate yourself.
2) Remember: Smart is Sexy!
…with Rose Hansey (firstname.lastname@example.org)